Nation Misses State of Union Due to Food in Obama’s Teeth

WASHINGTON, D.C. – The President’s State of the Union address, typically a time for national discussion and debate of the day’s leading concerns, instead left people at a loss for any reaction this time. During the course of the speech, instead of focusing on what was being said, no one could refrain from staring at a piece of food lodged in President Obama’s teeth.

Obama has food in his teeth during the speed
Obama’s oratory skills no match for piece of spinach

The green piece of food clearly stood out as the President spoke, made all the more grotesque to those watching in HD television. The object remained throughout the long speech, which viewers simply could not look away from.

“I’m not sure what he talked about, but it should have been on the importance of flossing,” said Amy Anderson. “It was disgusting.”

Point after point, while Obama waited for applause, lawmakers in attendance gave no reaction as they studied the object intently. In the post-analysis surveys, the economy was replaced as the leading concern of Americans┬áby knowing the type of food in Obama’s teeth. Additionally, asked whether or not they approved of the speech, 10% approved, 10% disapproved, and 80% simply shrugged their shoulders.

The Republican response given immediately after the speech was unusually brief. Republican Paul Ryan simply gave a rebuttal consisting of “What did he say? Oh no, I missed that whole thing.”