Drivers Forced to Detour Around DFW as All Highways Under Construction

Legal Weed 2 States Away

IRVING – Drivers looking to utilize the highways are being routed through a brief 50 mile detour encircling the DFW region while the area is temporarily under construction. The detour is being supported by the new city-funded billboards “What Are You Doing Here When There’s Legal Weed Two States Away?” ad campaign designed to discourage traffic.

A spokesperson for Texas Department of Transportation detailed the coming road improvements. “It’s going to be great for drivers when we’re finished. On every highway, we’re adding a toll lane, an HOV lane, an 18-wheeler lane, a lane just for white Chevy trucks with bumper stickers that say ‘drive it like you stole it,’ a half-pipe lane for skateboarders, and one permanently closed lane for more construction.

“In the meantime, we’re just going to have to route everyone around through a couple of side streets in Abilene and Tyler,” he added.

Asked when the regional detour would be over, the spokesperson declined to give a date. “There’s a lot underway, so it’s going to be a while before it’s done. We thought it would be best to work on all of the highways at the same time. I’m not sure why we thought that.”

Additionally, TX DOT tasked one employee with setting up the 18,000 detour signs. “I was supposed to have this done a while ago. Honestly, I’m going to put up maybe 5 of these and toss the other 17,995 in a ditch somewhere.”

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